Sunday, October 11, 2009

Putting An End To School Violence

As we near the end of National Bullying Prevention Awareness Week (October 4th -10th)I am pleased that so many have responded to our STOMP Out Bullying campaign and BLUE SHIRT Day. Since its launch in October, 2008, over 54,000 kids and parents have made the commitment to STOMP Out Bullying. And people across the country wore blue shirts to work and to school. Scripps Ranch High School in San Diego was a sea of blue as almost 2600 kids wore blue shirts to STOMP Out Bullying. But there’s a lot more work to do to keep our kids safe.

It is heartbreaking to hear about the fatal beating of Derrion Albert in Chicago, the attack of a 14 year-old boy in New Jersey who suffered from multiple fractures by three 16 year-old boys who kicked and stomped him, and the 12-year-old boy on Coral Springs, FL who faces first-degree murder charges after allegedly stabbing a 13-year-old boy in the back with a kitchen knife. All of this since school began one month ago.

Violent behavior that robs our children of their childhood, education and at times their lives, and continues a cycle of violence is not acceptable. Parents can no longer live in denial when their children are accused of violent behavior and schools can no longer sweep this issue under the rug, as they’ve been doing this for far too long.

According to the National Youth Violence Prevention Resources Center, over 5.7 million children in the U.S. are involved in bullying either as a victim or culprit –or both. That’s 30% of school kids.

A new CCRC survey finds that U.S. children are routinely exposed to even more violence and abuse than has previously been recognized, with nearly half experiencing a physical assault in the study year.

The survey findings conclude that:
• More than 60 percent of the children surveyed were exposed to violence within the past year, either directly or indirectly.
• Nearly one-half of the children and adolescents surveyed were assaulted at least once in the past year, and more than 1 in 10 were injured as a result.
• Nearly one-quarter of the respondents were the victim of a robbery, vandalism, or theft.
• One-tenth of respondents were victims of child maltreatment (including physical and emotional abuse, neglect, or a family abduction), and 1 in 16 were victimized sexually.

Violence against children has become a national crisis. It's not just in Chicago, New Jersey or Miami-Dade, it's all over the country. While schools have been sweeping this issue under the rug far too long, they must enforce policies and educate students on this subject. Schools must introduce violence prevention which covers bullying and cyberbullying into their curriculum – insisting that parents participate in school committees to understand the curriculum and bring it into their homes and communities.

And for parents who live in denial saying “My child would never harm anyone” or worse take a “so what” attitude, think again. Kids learn these behaviors at home. Whether it’s a parent who is violent, to a parent who handles conflict in an angry and negative way, a parent who is full of hatred or to a parent who just doesn’t have the time to be involved in their children’s lives … this is learned behavior. What is learned can be unlearned.

Ultimately it's up to the students to stop the violence and create violence-free communities in their schools and neighborhoods. But they need the support of their schools and families.

So very often people make comments such as “the kids need to toughen up” or think the violence only happens in poor neighborhoods. Not true! School violence is no longer a right of passage. Our kids are living in a very different world than we did and with the Internet and our youth not understanding the consequences of their behavior, it’s a real problem. Kids think it’s fun to beat someone up and place the video of it on YouTube. And, violence does not discriminate. It can occur in poor, middle income and wealthy neighborhoods.

It’s time for parents and schools to work together, introduce violence prevention curriculum into all schools across the country and empower our kids to say ENOUGH! No more violence at school or in our communities.

Monday, September 7, 2009

President Obama's Speech To Kids As They Return To School

There's been a lot of controversy about the speech that President Obama is giving to school children tomorrow.

There are many people up in arms. Some parents are pulling their kids out of school so they don't see or hear the speech, and some schools are refusing to show it.

Has everyone lost their minds? What do they think the President is going to say to our children?

President Obama is clearly a champion of giving kids a good education and offering them a future. After reading the letter that he openly wrote to his daughters earlier this year in Parade Magazine, I can only imagine that he will be a cheerleader for our kids to study hard and stay in school so that they can be anything they want to be. Last time I checked there was nothing wrong with that.

Could these parents and schools be anti-education? Could they be denying our kids a future? Or is it a partisan issue?

No matter who you voted for, no matter what race you are -- this is the President of the United States and he cares about our kids' education!

It behooves every parent to send their kids to school tomorrow and let them hear the speech, and it behooves every school to air the speech.

Frankly, I cannot think of anything more inspiring than the President of the United States telling kids to study hard and stay in school so that they can be whatever they want to be in life!

It certainly would have inspired me when I was a kid!

Click Here to Read President Obama's Remarks

Ross Ellis
Founder and Chief Executive Officer
Love Our Children USA

Monday, August 31, 2009

BLUE SHIRT DAY October 5th To STOMP Out Bullying




To signify the importance of National Bullying Prevention Awareness Week (october 4th - 10th), on Monday, October 5th, we are asking kids, teens and adults across the nation to participate in BLUE SHIRT DAY by wearing a blue shirt to STOMP Out Bullying.

Love Our Children USA created this day and chose the color blue because in many diverse cultures blue brings peace.The color conveys importance and confidence.
On Monday, October 5th, Americans across the country will wear blue shirts as they make their way to school or to the office in support of this new annual grassroots national campaign to STOMP Out Bullying.


You can order Blue Shirts from Love Our Children USA or wear your own. The most important thing is to wear a BLUE SHIRT on OCTOBER 5th to school, to work, everywhere --- to show support of bullying and cyberbullying prevention and to STOMP Out Bullying!

Please join this grassroots effort. Someone you know could be bullied. Someone you know might be a bully.

Spread the word – in schools, communities, at work, on Facebook, MySpace and Twitter – tell everyone you know -- friends, family, neighbors, colleagues -- to wear a BLUE Shirt on Monday, October 5th. Let’s put an end to bullying and STOMP it out across the nation! Let's keep America's kids and teens safe at school and in their communities.

www.stompoutbullying.org

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Love Our Children USA And Barclays ...Tickets Fore Charity

If you love golf and are passionate about keeping children safe, please support Love Our Children USA by purchasing tickets to the Barclays Golf Tournament at Liberty National Center, Jersey City, NJ from August 27th - August 30th.

See your favorite pros! All you need to do is purchase tickets is click here and use the code LOC !

Sunday, March 15, 2009

More Cases OF Child Abuse In Times Of Overwhelm

More child abuse reports now? YES!

Parents and child caregivers are stressed and overwhelmed from the economy.

Overwhelmed parents and caregivers find it difficult to handle the stress. So when the kids scream and want a new toy or act out, parents take it out on their kids. We saw it with Hurricane Katrina, 9-11 and every other disaster. This is a time when many parents are at their breaking point.

As we face difficult times it is imperative that we do not overlook our children who are react to their parent’s overwhelm and stress. And we must not overlook our children who are at risk and peril on a daily basis … and at even greater risk in times of stress.

No family is without stress and overwhelm today. But even in these difficult times, we must remember:

· Understand the problem
Child abuse and neglect affect children of all ages, races, and incomes. Over 3 million children are victimized each year and those are only the ones that are reported. The actual number is three times greater.

· Understand the various forms
Child Abuse is physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse, shaken baby syndrome, neglect and abandonment, and death.

· Understand the causes
Most parents are loving and nurturing and wouldn’t think of hurting or neglecting their children. Yet some parents were themselves abused or neglected and they continue the cycle. Very young or inexperienced parents will likely not know how to take care of their babies or what they can reasonably expect from children at different stages of development. Extraordinary circumstances that stress families can be poverty, divorce, sickness, disability …which can play a part in child abuse and neglect. Parents who abuse alcohol or other drugs are more likely to abuse or neglect their children.

· Support programs that support families
Parent education, community centers, respite care services, and substance abuse treatment programs help to protect children by addressing circumstances that place families at risk for child abuse and neglect. Donate your time or money, if you can.

· Report suspected abuse and neglect
Some states require everyone to report suspected abuse or neglect; others specify members of certain professions, such as educators and doctors. Regardless of whether you are mandated by law to report child abuse and neglect, doing so could save a child—and a family. If you suspect a child is being abused or neglected, call the police, your state child abuse hotline or your local child welfare agency.

· Spread the word
Help educate others in your community about child abuse and neglect. Distribute brochures at your local public library, recreation or community center, government center, church, synagogue, mosque, temple, or other faith institutions, grocery stores, and other public places.

· Strengthen your community
Know your neighbors' names and the names of their children, and make sure they know yours. Give stressed parents a break by offering to watch their children. Volunteer. If you like interacting with children, great, but you do not have to volunteer directly with kids to contribute to prevention. All activities that strengthen communities, such as service to civic clubs and participation on boards and committees, ultimately contribute to the well-being of children.

· Be ready in an emergency
Everyone has witnessed the screaming-child-in-the-supermarket scenario. Most parents take the typical tantrum in stride. But what if you witness a scene—in the supermarket or anywhere else—where you believe a child is being, or is about to be, physically or verbally abused?

Responding in these circumstances technically moves beyond prevention to intervention, and intervention is best handled by professionals. Still, if you find yourself in a situation where you believe a child is being or will be abused at that moment, you can help the situation by calmly approach the parent and offering the following:

· “I guess their right when they say parents need a lot of patience.” “It looks like you’ve both had a very long day.”
· Ask if you can help in any way — Can you carry some packages? Play with an older child so the baby can be fed or changed? Call someone on your cell phone?
· If you see a child alone in a public place—for example, unattended in a grocery cart—stay with the child until the parent returns.

Love Shouldn't Hurt

Recently the media has reported the story of Chris Brown beating his girlfriend Rihanna.

Dating violence affects about one in ten teen couples. Teenagers can often misinterpret abusive and violent behavior as a show of love. Hitting, yelling, threatening, name calling, and using and hurting you sexually isn't love!

Media reports also indicate that Rihanna has gone back to Chris Brown. Once a guy hits a girl or worse, it is important to know that no matter how sorry they are, and no matter how times they swear they'll never do this again, it's not true.

When someone is violent it's learned behavior. That's what's what they learned while growing up. They believe they won't do it again ... but they will because that's all they know.

Read more about Teen Dating Violence and how to stay safe here and remember ... LOVE SHOULDN'T HURT!!!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

National Love Our Children Day Goes On The Road With Soap Stars

The Sixth Annual Love Our Children Day Goes On The Road For an Entire Weekend of Family Fun!

This year Love Our Children USA is doing something different for National Love Our Children Day (our initiative.) Through the generosity of soap stars ...

ALL MY CHILDREN Jacob Young (JR) Chrishell Strause (Amanda)
AS THE WORLD TURNS Billy Magnusson (Casey)
GUIDING LIGHTKim Zimmer (Reva) Caitlin VanZandt (Ashlee)Robert Newman (Josh)
ONE LIFE TO LIVEIlene Kristen (Roxy) Mark Lawson (Brody)

... And the Villa Roma Resort in Sullivan County, NY., National Love Our Children Day joins SOAPSTOCK Weekend and will be celebrated in a new location this year!

To learn more about how you and your family can attend this event, visit http://loveourchildrenusa.org/events_locday09.php

Thursday, January 15, 2009

FIRST DAD'S MESSAGE OF LOVE

FIRST DAD'S MESSAGE OF LOVE OBAMA'S LETTER: 'WHAT I WANT FOR YOU & ALL KIDS'

When I read this letter, I thought “Wow!” Not just because Barack Obama is going to be our president next week, but look at the love! Feel the hope!

I always speak and write about parents nurturing and loving their children. And one does not have to be a president to do this. Loving children, yours and other people’s takes compassion, and a deep caring for our most innocent – our children.

And you don’t have to be a parent to nurture and love children. Many single people or couples without children can show the same compassion, love and nurturing that President Elect Obama shows and feels. WHY? Because if we don’t, what will our future look like in 10 or 20 years?

If we don’t, we might be looking at a generation of adults who didn’t have a good education and can barely earn a living. Or a generation of adults who are criminals or substance abusers, or child and spousal abusers. Or a generation of adults who are filled with hatred for their fellow man because that’s what they were taught by their role models. Or… sadly, a generation of adults who continue the cycle of how badly there were treated.

Certainly none of these scenarios would have challenged these adults as children, nor would they have been inspired to do better or to create a safe and prejudice-free world. None of these scenarios would bring us future leaders and people who give back.

To love and nurture children and want the very best for them, you can be an ordinary parent, aunt, uncle, grandparent, neighbor or friend. You can challenge and inspire them, and instill in them self-esteem and confidence, so that they can strive to be anything –even President of the United States. It just takes love, nurturing and respect.

If you need help, ask someone. Take parenting classes.
Contact Love Our Children USA.

If President Elect Obama’s letter of love and hope for his children and all children hasn’t challenged and inspired every parent in the U.S.to be the best and most loving parents they can be, then it’s a sad time for the future of our children, their children, and future generations.

Why not write a letter of love to your children – today? Give your children hope for their future.

You can read the First Dad's Message of Love this Sunday in Parade Magazine or
click here to view at Parade online.

Ross Ellis
Founder and Chief Executive Officer
Love Our Children USA

Monday, January 12, 2009

Renew America With A Day of Service January 19, 2009

Ordinary people living ordinary lives is all it takes to make things happen in your community. President-Elect and Michelle Obama are asking the country to volunteer and renew America on Monday, January 19th … One Single Day of Service.

It can be handing out flyers about bullying prevention which has reached epidemic proportions, mentoring a child, cleaning up parks, volunteering at a homeless shelter, serving food to the hungry … or anything that will help those less fortunate.

Contact Love Our Children USA if you want to hand out flyers on Bullying Prevention or visit USA Call To Service to find an opportunity in your area.

No matter what you do, you will helping to renew the USA, offering help and hope. Please join the Obamas and Love Our Children USA! Make it a day of service… a day of caring … a day of renewal!

Positive Parenting

Knowing that the world we live in today is very different, Love Our Children USA recognizes that we must redefine parenting.No one is a perfect parent and there is no magical way to raise children. And we know kids can be challenging!Parenthood and caring for a child is a gift bestowed upon us which comes with the greatest responsibility and pledge … to guarantee the safety, nurturing, loving environment and physical and emotional wellness of our children … for ALL children!Anyone and everyone can learn good parenting skills. Even parents who are overwhelmed, or alone. The first three years of your child’s life are crucial. Those are the years that your child will develop significant intellectual, emotional and social abilities. That’s when they learn to give and accept love. They learn confidence, security, and empathy … they learn to be curious and persistent …everything your child needs to learn to relate well to others, and lead a happy and productive life. The first three years are the doorway to forever!Positive Parenting Means:- Treating Kids With Respect, Kindness and Compassion- Showing your love – Nurture your children and tell them every day "I love you. You're special." Give lots of hugs and kisses.- Understanding- Negotiation- Listening to your children tells them that you think they're important and that you're interested in what they have to say.- Giving Praise and Encouragement - When your children learn something new or behave well, tell them you're so proud of them. Criticize the behavior, not the child. Teaching your child to do the right things is better than constantly punishing bad behavior.- Reinforcing Positive Behavior- Providing order in their lives. Keep a regular schedule of meals, naps and bedtimes. If you have to change the schedule, tell them about the changes ahead of time.- Setting Boundaries- Make Your Children Feel Protected. Comfort them when they're scared. Show them you've taken steps to protect them and keep them safe.- Reflecting on Our Parent Role Models- Helping Kids Find Solutions to Their Own Problems- Building Children's Self-Esteem- Teaching Kids How to Deal With Sibling Rivalry, Anger, Peer Pressure, Bullying, etc .- Spending Time With Your Children. Do things together, like reading, walking, playing and cleaning house. What children want most is your attention. They usebad behavior as a way of getting your attention.- Being Consistent and firm in enforcing rules and explaining the reasons for the rules in words your child can understand. Consistent means the rules are the same all the time. If two parents are raising a child, both need to use the same rules.Do you feel like you need help?You can contact Love Our Children USA for parenting classes in your area, sign up for parenting classes offered by hospitals, community centers or schools. Read parenting books or magazines. Talk to your pediatrician, family doctor, a minister, a priest or a counselor. Don't be embarrassed to ask for parenting help. Raising children is not easy and no one can do it alone. Your doctor can also help you find local groups that can help you learn better parenting skills.To receive Love Our Children USA’s newsletters and updates visit www.loveourchildrenusa.org
Continuing the Cycle of Love and Nurturing
When a child pushes a parent’s buttons or misbehaves, sometimes all a parent can do is to lose their temper or speak harshly to their child. And sometimes …a parent treats their child the way they were treated …with anger and violence – continuing the cycle. Today, parents are more sophisticated than they were 20 or 30 years ago. And they’re busier and overwhelmed. By continuing the cycle of how our parents treated us when we were children isn’t necessarily positive parenting. That doesn’t always mean our parents were bad parents –it might mean they were continuing the cycle of how they were treated. It’s time to break the cycle today! Whether you’re a parent who is over-whelmed or one who is continuing the cycle … think back to your childhood. How were you treated?Did you live in a loving home? Or did you live in an angry and violent home?If you lived in a loving home, then you will want to continue that cycle with your children.If you lived in an angry and violent home, you remember what growing up was like. It was sad, lonely and frightening.Is that the kind of home you want your child to grow up in?By loving and nurturing your children and treating them with kindness, respect and understanding, you are ending an old cycle and beginning a new one.You CAN stop the violence, anger and neglect BEFORE it ever starts!Take a deep breath, count to ten, seek help through anger management and parenting classes or consult with a psychologist. The caring, compassion, love and respect you show your children will make such a difference in your relationship with your children and you -- and your entire family. Children understand positive behaviors.Become a parent who loves and nurtures your child enough to grow up to become a happy and healthy adult who continues that cycle!What a wonderful gift to give your children ... and their children, and theirs, and theirs, and theirs ... etc!If you need help or resources to break the cycle of anger and violence and begin a new cycle of love and nurturing, please contact Love Our Children USA.